木刻在心

刘庆元

  我其实一直梦想着能成为一名科考队员。就是那种生活在时间之外的,可以四处游历,风餐路宿的人。时常想像着他们行走在夜深人静之时的样子,又或是对着一块石头、一片树叶和一只蝴蝶念念有词同时还写下点什么的时刻……(这让我想起美国作家纳博科夫),我永远佩服和敬重这样的人。所以,每当在媒体上看到相关的报导我都会浮想连翩好一阵子。
  我做木刻,是后天环境造成的。我从小画画,直到现在还有着睡前画一会儿打仗公仔的习惯。记得当年填写高考志愿的时候,我依次写下:美术学院、警察学校和厨师学校。前者成就我现在的职业,后两者则己转化为我茶余饭后爱看的电视节目。现在回想起来,我仍然坚信自己在警察和厨师这两个行当中会做得不赖,或许会更艺术。这种做这行想那行的心态对我的木刻创作具有直接影响。我做木刻并不是为了成为一个伟大的版画工作者,至少在就读版画系的时候最喜爱的只是素描,一度还尝试过直接性的素描创作。基于当时那种没怎么细想就干的劲头,我几乎是本能的将个人素描意识嫁接到了黑白木刻的创作上。我纷杂的阅读习惯,对电影的痴迷和对音乐的喜好都缓缓注入到黑色木刻的细缝之中,这就像是在漆黑的夜里适逢一场暴雨,而雨点洒落之处迸现的点点白光正是那来之不易的美妙;这就像是行进途中的陌生人随兴而起的大声吟唱而你碰巧成为了他唯一的听众;这就像是伤感的青年沿着河边一直走而他的爱人正在一棵树下等着他;这就像是劳累一天的庄稼人仰躺在草丛中沉沉睡去而他的孩子正在旁边叫嚷着什么;这就像是秋冬的夜晚大家围聚在篝火旁欢声笑语直到拂晓;这就像是更多的困惑朝你迎面而来的时候所采取的一种顽强的抵制方式;这就像是办公室里的文员听着收音机随歌起舞而做为同事的你站在旁边思量该怎么办才好……
  我一直在这么做,并沉迷于此。木刻会随着时间的流逝而生长,它总会让你在不期然中想起些什么同时又固执的使你忘却更多的其它,神秘而令人骄傲。
  在完成最后一张黑白木刻的时候,你会看到色彩。

 

  I have actually been dreaming of being an outdoor scientific researcher . That is to say: I have freedom to live and travel in an outside, natural world so that I am able to enjoy the natural life, sleeping and eating outdoor under sky. More often than not, I imagine myself to wander around at a tranquil night studying a stone, a piece of leaf or a butterfly and things like that .Meanwhile, meditating in nature and to record down whatever I feel important and impressive.(this kind of thought reminds me of the American writer Vladimir Nabokov who I admired so much and would last for good). Therefore, whatever I read something related to him in the media, I tented to connect myself to him and this mental state would trigger my imagination which would go wild and wander on and on in the artistic and spiritual world..

  I devoted my life to the art of woodcutting, due to the environment of my early life in child hood. I started drawing and painting while still a little boy. Interestingly , even till now, I still kept the childhood-habit of sketching down some worriers fighting one another, before my bed time.

  I sill recalled the day when I filled in the enrolling forms after my college entrance exams, making choice of my college major. My first choice was: to study of art. And the second one was to be a police, and the last choice of my future profession was to learn how to become a chef. Now, my first interest has become my current profession which is fine art, and the later two interests and wishes have become my favorite TV programs after dinner in the evening. Anyway, when I recall my choice of profession, I still believe that: if I took the profession of being a police or a chef, I also could do a good job in either of the two occupation, and I even thought that I might be a better “artist ” in both said professions.

  This sort of uncertainty or unstable attitude towards choosing my profession, would have a strong impact on my current profession as an artist, and on my artistic creative activities. To be an artist of woodcut, does not mean that I have dreamed of becoming of a superb artist in this area. At least, when I was a student in the woodcut department, my real interest was more in drawing rather than woodcutting. I even tried to create artwork with pure black and white drawing media and technique. Based on that kind of bold art intuition and impulse, I applied the skills of drawing into woodcutting with inner instinct. For a quite while, I put most my efforts, observation, acts and ideas in art creations, not based on the goal of achieving perfections, but based on accumulation and experiencing in everyday life to support this “artistic gambling”. My habit of reading broadly, crazing about movies and the love of music, have gradually implanted into the gap of my artworks of black woodcut. This creative process is just like being at a dark night with a rage storm, when raindrops falling onto the ground, causing white dots of light, which would create the incredible and rarely-found beauty and charm; This process also resembles the song sung loudly by a stranger wandering in wilderness, and it happened to be heard by you who is the only audience at the moment; This is also like a sadden young man who has been walking along the riverside, and all of a sudden, it appeared that his lover is waiting for him under a tree ; It is like th a farmer who ,after a hard day’s work, fell asleep on the grass-ground and his child was yelling loudly by his side; It is like a late autumn night when people are sitting circling a outdoor fire, talking on and on till dawn light breaking; It is like that when you are facing the puzzling and confusing world yet you still take a firm-attitude to accept the challenging; It is like the moment when an office clerk dancing with the radio-music and you being a co-work at the sight has no idea what you should do. Ii is like a person who got lost on his way and pick up a big stone running on this crazy planet……

  I have been doing my work like this and have been indulging in this process. The art of woodcutting will grow continuously, when the time goes by, and it will always let your thought come out from nowhere. Meanwhile, it persists in letting go some more of your past memories, mysteriously and proudly.